Round Conference Tables

What is the best way to fart when in a meeting without revealing yourself?

how to camouflage the act when you are in a meeting around a rectangular table with 20 people sitting all around.

Public Comments

1. seep it out slowly
2. cough simultaneously
3. hope it comes out silent
4. Let it go slowly, if it's a stinker than blame someone beside you just make sure that you are the 1st to smell it than you look innocent.
5. Aaaaahhhh, just lift your butt cheek and let it out with a mighty roar. Who cares, you only live once! What can they do, fire you?
6. i'm not sure, but i really love this question. i would just let one rip. the looks of shock would be hilarious good luck :D
7. blame it on the oldest, ugliest, or prettiest person in the room. Fart and strategically move away from that corner.
8. take some rolaids before the meeting and don't fart.
9. Excuse yourself !! then go buy yourself some Phasyme it works!! Been feeding to my husband for years.
10. Try to hold it until you are ready to get out of the meeting. A good rip is usually reason for adjournment, or just let it rip and smile real big !!
11. let it out slowly,then give onther a dirty look, so others think its them,but there is old saying,which is placed on a tombstone,it is, wherever you be let you wind go free,as the want of a fart was the death of me, his wife had it placed as he was in a meeting and held it,it caused him to have a heart attack,from which he died.
12. There's only one choice...the so-called "silencer attack"- hopefully a silent, but deadly one. Good luck.
13. get a hold of the george carlin skit of faring in public and take notes
14. Be civilized and excuse yourself by doing outside of the room
15. ooze, let a little out. wait a few minutes and let a little more.
16. Knock over a cup of coffee on the table (or whatever beverage is handy) as you break the mighty wind. That way, the commotion of the spillage will outweigh the sound and/or smell from your anal monologue. Also, you can run out of the room to get paper towels leaving the remaining meeting attendees to blame each other for the smell (in case anyone notices). But, make sure you knock the beverage over just BEFORE you do the deed, otherwise, you've blown your cover (literally). This maneuver takes control, recommended only for the experienced!
17. Let it rip and blame the person you want to date. Fart blames are great ice breakers. Good luck, drink Coke...
18. Let it pass slowly..with brakes..not in one go..coz tht cud produce weird sounds!!